First Week With Baby "J"

A friend came over this weeknd with her six-year-old daughter who noticed that I had not set up one of the play mats in the nursery, and the little girl made herself useful in fixing it for J. She patted my arm and said, “I know this is tough, but I think you’ll get a hang of it eventually.”

Friday was the biological mom’s detention hearing, to see whether it was legal for the state to take away her child to begin with. Since we heard nothing, that’s good. If it had been found in her favor, there wouldn’t have been any phone calls, just cops at our door to take him away.

Next, we’ll be hearing who the judge for this case will be, which will determine a lot. There are judges renowned for doing anything for reunification with mothers and babies (“M’am, if you could just do crack and whore on weekends only, maybe?”), and we’re hoping we don’t get one of those or it’ll be a long, drawn-out process.

Best scenario from our point of view is that the judge severs parental rights off the bat, and we’re fast track for adoption in 6 months. Otherwise it could take a year or more if the mother keeps getting second and third and fourth chances – which happens.

6 Things we have learned about Baby J this week:

1. He goes through 10 to 12 diapers a day, sometimes one right after the other.
2. Only 3 things make him cry: being wet, being hungry, needing a burp. It’s no use trying to find another reason, even if it doesn’t make sense that he could be wet, hungry, or needing a burp.
3. He had his first solid food – rice cereal – last night, and loved it. Ate every bit.
4. He is the most social baby. He beams when there’s company over, new people to coo over him.
5. He is fascinated by himself. He can stare into the mirror at himself without blinking.
6. He is nearly there on sitting up on his own, and can stand up as long as someone’s there to help him keep his balance. We may have to lower his mattress in his crib soon to keep him from climbing out.

One thing I didn't have to learn this week, but was emphasized:

1. Thank God for friends and family.